Julian Briggs August 1998
Based on an article by Liz Duff, Published in the CCI (USA)
newsletter Openings II. (Collective wisdom and experience in
building a Co-Counselling Community on the North Shore of
Massachusetts.)
So: You want to build a community. You're out there all alone, a
sole co-counsellor. What can you do?
- Find other co-counsellors in your area
- Teach someone yourself, one to one
- Organise a fundamentals class
- Train as a co-counselling teacher
- Join a Re-Evaluation (RC) Co-Counselling class
The CCI Contact Persons (UK or world) can help you find
co-counsellors near you.
An under-used, easily accessible way in to co-counselling.
There are several co-counselling manuals
and guides to teaching co-counselling one to one.
- Teach it Yourself:
- Co-Counselling Fundamentals 12 Classes & 2 Saturday
Workshops by Gail Fuller (a CCI (USA) teacher). A handbook giving
an excellent step by step format for teaching a fundamentals class
and handouts for co-counselling fundamentals.
- Co-Counselling Manual by John Heron 1998
- How to Change Yourself & Your World: a Manual of
Co-Counselling Theory and Practice by Rose Evison & Richard
Horobin, 1985. A comprehensive, detailed manual.
Teaching Co-Counselling One-to-One
by Richard Goldsbrough (originally published in the New Zealand
Co-Counselling Newsletter)
Teaching one-to-one should be encouraged as an honourable
enterprise for any co-co. Indeed I find that I learn best what I
teach. So I see no problem with two people embarking on a joint
enquiry into what works well for them as they apply co-co techniques
and theory to resolving their issues. There is no reason why such
an enquiry should stop at that which was learnt on the Basics
Course. There is no reason why the enquiry should include all that
was learnt on the Basics Course. I doubt if I would tread on many
toes to suggest the co-co is not a closed subject set in concrete.
Hopefully it is a launching pad for personal growth and emerging
emotional competence. However, to be co-co there are a few
non-negotiable principles and practices which are dealt with in
detail in the next section but the most important must be:
- the client is in-charge,
-
confidentiality,
- equal time.
So all power to those courageous (or desperate) enough to teach a
friend or colleague to co-counsel.
Supposing your friend then wishes to join the network. In CCI we
expect that a network member has had 40 hours of co-counselling
training with an accredited teacher. I also expect that any network
member will know:
- that the client is in charge
- about confidentiality and honour it
- what a session is and how it is structured
- the importance of equal time
- what an ID check is
- about discharge and be comfortable in the presence of my discharge
- how to give good free attention for the full duration of a session
- what a normal contract is and be able to use appropriate interventions without attachment
- the value of celebration
- about ANSA (Aware Negotiation of Sexual Attraction) and be able to use it
- how to take responsibility for her/his own stuff
- the theory underpinning co-co
anything else?
How could I be sure someone who has done a one-to-one enquiry
will have those skills and understandings? Obviously the surest way
is for your friend to do a Basics Course and I don't see a problem
of asking for a place as a retrainee paying half. If you are an
accredited teacher I'm likely to accept that all these bases have
been covered. Another possibility we may like to explore is for
your friend to have sessions with 2 or 3 other network members. If
3 people in the network agree that your friend is a co-co then I
am likely to feel comfortable with their presence in the network.
These are my personal thoughts and are not policy (whatever that
is). What do you think?
Organise a fundamentals class run by a co-counselling teacher, the co-counselling
contacts (UK and world) may be able to help you find a
teacher. You find a venue, promote and administer the class. Plan
well in advance to give yourself time to find a venue, to get
publicity out early and to give the teacher and participants plenty
of notice.
Marketing Suggestions:
People have found the following places to be good locations to post flyers:
-
Places where people are caring about there health such as:
- Health food stores
- Fitness Clubs
- Hospitals
-
Places where 12 step programs are hosted
- Massage Therapist's Offices
- Men's Groups
- Unitarian Churches
- Chiropractor's offices
- Particular segments of the population you see as particularly needing the
tools of co-counselling such as:
- People in the Prison System
- Battered women shelters
- Unemployed people
- High School or Middle School students
- Disgruntled RC co-counsellors
- Single parents
-
Other possibilities:
- Adult education (many UK courses are offered this way)
- ...
Who can assist you in marketing co-counselling
Many alternative health professionals refer people.
"I have found my chiropractor, and other professionals willing
to post flyers in their office. I have found a whole health center
willing to give me their guest book mailing list. I have found
greatest response when I made an announcement in my church, and was
available afterwards to answer questions. " Liz Duff.
Consider what the needs of participants may be
-
Do you need to lower the fee for certain people?
- Can you work out
barter arrangements?
- Can you find a handicapped accessible site?
- Can you find a site that allows childcare to take place there, and
provide those services somehow?
- Can you find a site located near public transportation?
- Consider calling the class something else.
Many people have never heard of the term "co-counselling" and may be
turned off by it. They may, however arrive in droves for something
called "stress management," using CCI techniques.
Offer more basic personal growth work, classes etc
Things like assertiveness training, stress management
or counselling skills, particularly whatever is 'flavour of the
month'. John Talbut.
At the moment in this country you can enroll any amount of
people on basic counselling skills classes. Or you could run
introduction to co-counselling classes (i.e. pre-fundamentals) and
call them some 'flavour of the month' name." John Talbut .
Consider offering a Pre-Fundamentals Class: Suggestions for a
'pre-fundamentals' class: Working in a group with ground rules Basic
listening, Free attention, Not reassuring I would be hoping to get
participants to realise the value of working with discharge,
possibly mainly through free attention sessions and then feedback
and discussion in the group. John Talbut.
"In Our Own Hands" by Sheila Ernst and
Lucy Goodison (ISBN 0-7043-3841-6) has some suggestions for
incorporating co-counselling into non/not yet co-counselling groups.
Once you have some contacts, consider practicing the following: The
Art and Practice of Telephone Enrollment Compiled and written by Pam
MacDonald, based on conversations with Judy Hartling, Cathy Sargent,
and Carol Driscoll, edited and added to by Fred Wallace:
Do some deep thinking about why you want this person in
particular to participate in the workshop (class). Think
selfishly. Speak from the heart. Be honest.
Listen to where they are in their life. Will the workshop be
useful to them? Tell them what you think. If you see that it is
not what they need, say so.
If they want the time to think about it, that's fine! Tell
them when you plan to call them back, ask them "Is that OK?"
Don't be concerned about the numbers. Be aware of them, but
think about the dynamic. Who do you want to have there? Who do you
want to connect with? Who is interested in the topic? Who wants
it?
Set time aside for making the calls. Make hours of calling
your goal, not numbers of participants. The numbers will come when
you connect with the person and the topic.
Record your side of the conversation so that you can listen
afterwards.
Write a page or 1/2 page about the specific person.
- Why you want them there.
- What you want out of the enrollment conversation.
Write what the workshop is about. Specifically in relation to
your next call if possible.
Always ask the person if they can think of anyone who might be
interested. Get as many people involved in the enrollment process
as possible.
If you are doing cold calling: because you have recently moved:
-
Attend various workshops in your
area. You might be able to get a list of attendants, and then have
people to call.
- Think about why you want anyone involved in a
co-counselling class, and what you get out of it personally. Ask a
question at the beginning of the conversation to feel them out.
Write up what you want to say, and adapt it as you get more
comfortable with it.
In the UK, intensive teacher training workshops are offered.
Members of CCI-USA are discussing the possibility of creating a
teacher training workshop.
See: co-counselling teachers manuals.
You may find local RC co-counsellors (and communities) in your area.
Co-counselling with an RC co-counsellor will give you equal paired
time, and the opportunity for discharge, however many basic
assumptions are different. In particular, the counsellor is
generally more in charge of a session than the client. For example,
a client is instructed in RC, to "take your counsellor's direction
(try 4 times) " to "work for re-emergence." whereas, in CCI, a
client is instructed to simply ignore any intervention that the
client wants to ignore.
My experience with participating in an RC class leads me to share
the following information: I was initially welcomed into an RC
class, with the teacher's and area reference person's (ARP)
awareness of my CCI roots. After a few months in the class, I was
asked to make a decision: to choose between RC and CCI. According
to the teacher and ARP, I could not do both. I informed them that I
was not willing to make the choice. I would continue to co-counsel
with anyone from either community who chose to co-counsel with me.
They then informed my regular co-counselling (RC trained) partner
who chose to continue co-counselling with me that he was no longer
welcome in the RC community I have heard of people who keep
connections in both communities, by keeping quiet about their CCI
affiliations. Liz Duff
CCI founders split from RC in the early 1970's. Many differences
have evolved since the split.
Building and Strengthening a Co-counselling Community
See also: Community Building.
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